2005-12-30

Regrets

Regrets
=======

A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not
in bed.  She put on her robe and went downstairs.  He was
sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of
him.  He appeared to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.

She saw him wipe a tear from his eye and take a sip of his coffee.

"What's the matter dear?
Why are you down here at this time of night?" she asked.

"Do you remember twenty years ago when we were dating and you
were only 16?" he asked.

"Yes, I do," she replied.

"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of
my car kissing?"

"Yes, I remember."

"Do you remember when he shoved that shotgun in my face and
said, 'Either you marry my daughter or spend twenty years in
jail?'"

"Yes, I do," she said.

He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,
"You know...

I would have gotten out today."


Calvin  Simper

2005-12-26

Hookah V Cigarettes.

Scientists contradict claims hookah safer than cigarettes
By CHRISTIANA NELSON
ChristianaNelson@coloradoan.com

2005-12-18

Lessons From a Yogi

Lessons From A Yogi

====================

Yogi Berra was a better baseball player than he was a speaker,

but he's probably quoted more than Churchill.  Much of what he

said seems silly, until you think about it for a moment...

then you discover a more profound meaning.

Here are a few of my favorite Yogi-isms.  Each is like a

Rorschach test and self-help course rolled up into one.

~Dean Rieck~

"You can't think and hit at the same time."

"Nobody goes there; it's too crowded."

"A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore."

"The only reason I need these gloves is 'cause of my hands."

"We were overwhelming underdogs."

"The other team could make trouble for us if they win."

"It's never happened in World Series history, and it hasn't

happened since."

"It's d`ej`a vu all over again!"

"We made too many wrong mistakes."

"If people don't come to the ballpark, how are you gonna stop

them?"

"If you ask me a question, I don't know I'm not going to

answer."

"Slump? I ain't in no slump...I just ain't hitting."

"It was hard to have a conversation with anyone, there were too

many people talking."

"Why buy good luggage?  You only use it when you travel."

"When you come to a fork in the road, take it."

"We're lost, but we're making good time."

"If the world were perfect it wouldn't be."

"If I didn't wake up I'd still be sleeping."

"I usually take a two hour nap from 1 to 4."

"If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."

"It gets late early out here."

"90% of the game is half mental."

"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't go

to yours."

"Steve McQueen looks good in this movie.  He must have made it

before he died."

"I'm as red as a sheet."

"I wish I had an answer to that because I'm tired of answering

that question."

"Pair up in threes."

"Congratulations.  I knew the record would stand until it was

broken."

"Don't get me right, I'm just asking!"

"Never answer an anonymous letter."

"You can observe a lot by watching."

"It's not too far, it just seems like it is."

"You've got to be careful if you don't know where you're going

'cause you might not get there."

"We have a good time together, even when we're not together."

"Little League baseball is a good thing 'cause it keeps the

parents off the streets and it keeps the kids out of the house!"

"The future ain't what it use to be."

"It ain't over till it's over."

"I really didn't say everything I said."

~Yogi Berra~

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