I know many people who are happily married, and I congratulate them on being so.  As a matter of fact, one of my friends is getting married tomorrow, so I will start by congratulating him on making an honest woman out of Mary!  LOL

Unfortunately, the state of marriage isn't for me.  This comes from a conversation I had this morning with a few of my friends in a conference room...

There are two parts to a marriage:  The actual relationship, and (at least in the US) a State approved "contract" between two people.  One does NOT determine the validity of the other in my opinion!

The actual relationship, the feelings, emotions, the unrelenting want and need to be with a specific person is there anyway.  Usually before the idea of marriage comes into the picture.  That is a great thing, and something that I believe most people spend a large portion of their lives looking for.  Under no circumstances should anyone degrade that type of relationship if it exists outside of the context of "Holy Matrimony" because that concept is dead and gone, and has been since the laws were passed that you can not get married without the approval of the State, which definitely is not Holy!

You see, in the US, no matter how much you love someone, and want to be with them, you cannot get married without first asking permission of the state in which you reside, or in the case of Nevada, the state in which you blow your retirement fund on a craps table on your honeymoon!  There is no "sanctity" to me in having to go ask some town clerk somewhere if I might have permission to marry the woman of my dreams.  I don't know this person, they don't know me, what in the name of all things Holy do they have to do with my marriage??? 

Well, I'll tell you what they have to do with it:  the states need to know so they know how much of your money they are entitled to in taxes, and how much to give each aggrieved party upon dissolution of the relationship.  Folks, marriage today is not anything Holy, it's a legal contract binding two people together in the eyes of the state.  They make money selling you the "right" to get married, and make even more money arbitrating your "right" to get back out of it!

Take my situation for example:  33, single, no kids, entrepreneur with a small and steadily growing business.  Now imagine I were to get married tomorrow, my wife does nothing but sit on the couch watching soap operas, and over the next several years the business takes off and I steadily increase the style in which we are living (the American Dream right?) and give her everything she ever wanted because quite frankly I want those things too.  Alright, now we have a marriage and standard of living which is based upon income from a business that she has put no work into (other than allowing me the time needed to develop it) but then things start heading south with the geese and the relationship falls apart.  Time for a divorce.  She is entitled, not to the business, but to half the money from the business according to the law so that she may maintain the lifestyle to which she has become accustomed to.  It's called alimony, and it is a perpetual state of financial support until such time as she remarries.  But why do that?  Why not just "shack up" with her boytoy and have the best of all worlds?  Nope, not a risk I am willing to take! 

Now, a couple of things:  one, I do believe in and want the type of relationship that a good marriage is based upon, I just don't EVER want the government that involved in my personal life.  The other thing, as women are becoming more and more successful, especially as entrepreneurs, they are being hit even harder than successful men in divorce courts.  The idea to me of a marriage license is nothing more than a certificate of ownership between people, and more specifically assets aquired during the life of the contract!