2005-09-05

TEACHING YOUR KIDS TO LIKE FOOTBALL

THIS NEXT TRICK ISN'T AN EASY ONE, BUT BOY IF YOU CAN PULL IT OFF YOU GET THE FAMILY GUY AWARD FOR SPORTS RECRUITING. THE MOST IMPORTANT TOOL TO USE IS YOUR KID'S NATURAL INSTINCTS TO BE COMPETITIVE WITH EACHOTHER. GET THEM TO PICK THE TEAM THEY LIKE AND ASK THEM TO CHOOSE THEIR FAVORITE PLAYER. NOW WE'VE GIVEN THEM THEIR OWN TEAM TO ROOT FOR.

    KEEP PLENTY OF SPORTS CAPS AND JERSEYS AROUND THE HOUSE, SO WHEN YOUR FAVORITE TEAM IS PLAYING, THEY CAN BE SPORTING YOUR FAVORITE TEAMS GEAR.

    IN FACT, RIGHT NOW MY PLAN IS GOING INTO ACTION. MY DAUGHTERS ARE PICKING OUT THEIR FAVORITE MIAMI HURICANE CAPS, AS WELL AS ADORNING THEMSELVES WITH THEIR FAVORITE U.M SHIRT. I'M IN GOOD SHAPE AND THERE'S ONLY 20 MIUTES TO KICKOFF. I REMIND THE KIDS ONE MORE TIME ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS GAME, AND THEY SEEM FIRED UP. I'M DOING IT. MY PLAN IS IN ACTION.

    WHEN YOUR TEAM SCORES, START HIGH-FIVING THE KIDS. GET THEM SCREAMING RIGHT ALONG WITH YOU. EXPLAIN TO THRM WHAT JUST HAPPENED AND BE MAKE SURE THEY WATCH THE INSTANT REPLAY A COUPLE OF TIMES SO THEY CAN ACTUALLY GRASP THE MAGNITUDE OF THAT LAST GREAT PLAY.

GRANT IT, THEY WON'T SIT THROUGH A WHOLE GAME WITH YOU, BUT THEY'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR FEAR YOU MAY TRY TO LURE THEM BACK ON THE SOFA, AND THEN AGAIN BE FORCED TO PARTICIPATE. WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T LET THEM TAKE OFF THE CAPS OR JERSEYS DURING THE GAME. THEY SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT THEY ARE THE TEAMS GOOD LUCK CHARM AND WE NEED THEM TO HELP US WIN. SHOULD YOUR TEAM LOSE, THEY MUST UNDERSTAND THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE YOUR LUCKY SHIRT ON AND THEY ARE NOT AT ALL RESPONSIBLE.

SO THERE YOU HAVE IT. A SMART FAMILY GUY KNOWS HE MUST HAVE HIS CHILDREN ON HIS SIDE. YOUR KIDS NOW LOVE FOOTBALL, WHETHER THEY LIKE IT OR NOT. BEST OF LUCK! THE FAMILY GUY